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pugs!
are mugs!
they eat shrubs then throw up on your rugs!

poodles
eat noodles
and waste time drawing doodles of strudels

dalmatians
cause frustration
'cause they're insane in their brain situation

so when you choose, your pooch, the truth is
there's only one pooch you should choose!

... we're compact
and aggressive
high impact
impressive
and we have two wa wa's

we have two wa-wa's 'cause we are chihuahuas
we have two wa-wa's 'cause we are chihuahuas
we have two wa-wa's 'cause we are chihuahuas and we are the best dog to put in your bag

spaniels have big ears that tangle
and they're vandals that always cause scandals!

labradors!
are total bores
and mentally defective eyesores!

There's shih-tzus and schnauzers
and dachshunds and corgis
and shar-peis, and greyhounds
but only one dog you should choose (and here's why!)

... we're tougher
and smaller
we're rougher
we're baller!
and we have two wa wa's

we have two wa-wa's 'cause we are chihuahuas
we have two wa-wa's 'cause we are chihuahuas
we have two wa-wa's 'cause we are chihuahuas and we are the best dog to put in your bag

we have two wa-wa's 'cause we are chihuahuas
we have two wa-wa's 'cause we are chihuahuas
we have two wa-wa's 'cause we are chihuahuas
we have two wa-wa's 'cause we are chihuahuas
we have two wa-wa's 'cause we are chihuahuas
we have two wa-wa's 'cause we are chihuahuas

credits

from Stare Not Into The Eye Of The Demo​-​Gorgon, released October 16, 2022
co-written by Henson Crabtree-Green and Paddy Green

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